Supportive. Nurturing. Trusting. Inspiring. Loving. Encouraging. Affirming.
These are just a few words that might reflect some of the better relationships you have, yet very different from the words you might use to describe those relationships that are leading you in another direction or no direction at all.
Leaving and letting go of relationships that are hurtful, abusive, painful and which contribute nothing to you is a far more difficult process than we might first imagine. Why would we allow ourselves to do anything that is hurtful to us, or allow any one else to impose these negatives? There is no short answer to this.
To even begin to acknowledge to yourself that you are in a primary relationship that is at least difficult and at worst threatening to your well being is a brave first step, yet it is a first step. Without the recognition of the facts of what is going on around you it is very difficult to then take any action away from what is not working for you in this moment.
Believing in yourself is a strong beginning. This may take time for you to realise as being true, especially if you have let yourself be walked upon, or stepped over or you have given away your self-esteem in the process of loving someone. Considering yourself and your well-being as sufficiently important and precious as to be looked after, this is a significant step in the right direction.
Where you see an experience of a good relationship, of caring, of friendship, expand this by spending more time on it and by placing more focus on the good that is already there. This will allow for the spread of that which already is present in your life into more of the same.
In the observation of good friends, the noticing of kindness, the allowing of patience or courage or nurture, let yourself see the display of these qualities and bring them further into yourself and your own daily experience. The more you can encourage this to happen, the less space there is for those actions and behaviors which are in the negative.
Begin to attract to you more of that which you desire to experience. Do this simply and calmly by requesting such to occur in your daily being.
You will begin to see the changes as soon as you request what you want. So ask for this to be here and now for you.